Sitting at the kitchen table today sorting through hundreds of photos before I went digital,
Cole sat beside me.
I was searching for that one special picture of Chloe for my blog.
There were far too many to choose from.
Suddenly, Cole yells,
"Oh my gosh Mom! Look at this. Dad is standing! How is he doing that?!"
My eyes filled with tears as I was reminded that he never knew that man.
It was before his time.
Unbelievable.
When I think of my husband and who he is, I remember dating him. His constant adoration.
I remember being newlyweds in a little apartment living on love.
So happy to have him home at the end of the work day.
Greeting him at the door with my new little baby.
I remember moving into our first home and our growing family.
I remember the sound of his diesel truck as he pulled in the driveway and
the children yelling and running out to greet him.
I remember his big firm hugs and slow dances.
All of these things meld into more current memories and experiences and are one.
That is who he is to me.
To think that some of our children have never known that man is strange still.
Sometimes I find myself wanting to fill them in on the whole picture. My picture.
Tell them what an awesome snow skier he was. Or water skier.
Or rollerblader. Or basketball player. Or golfer.
Or how he pulled the oldest 2 children on sleds like a snow dog endlessly in the winter.
Or that he use to work 16 hour days.
The father my children know has become even stronger and more humble,
gentler, and more forgiving.
His patience has grown tremendously. He is a fighter. A go-getter. A hardworker.
I looked at Cole and said, "Daddy use to be able to walk son. Before you were born."
He looked at me kind of unsure then pulled the picture out of Scott trying to pull the weight out of the ground in ToonTown. He giggled, "Look at Dad trying to lift that weight".
