Lucky you're alive.

Day 5:


Here it is again.
Scott's Anniversary.
I told him in the car at 6:00 this morning "It's your anniversary dear."
"Not an Anniversary Amy."
"Okay, a celebration of how far you've come since this day 6 years ago."
"Alright. Fine. It's a mark. A moment. "

Then we talked about the day we drove up to the University of Utah hospital's Emergency Room.
We'd waited long enough for a return call from a neurosurgeon and Scott's symptoms were becoming scary. So, we headed to the E.R. to announce at the little window "Hi, I'm here with my husband. He has a brain tumor. He's in immense pain."

We talked about driving up there so unsuspecting. Unknowing. Just ready to fix the problem and move on.  "He'll need some therapy before he can get back to work."
We can do that. Some therapy. Okay.

Certainly we got more than we bargained for.
I sometimes put myself in Scott's shoes.
Kissing your wife goodbye in the operating room.
Waking several hours later in a body, not your own.
Fighting over the next several weeks to perform the most basic tasks. Losing so much of what you've known. I can't imagine the immense fear. It would be easy to think of the day as a day of loss.

While Scott was in the hospital I brought the video camera up only once I believe.
It was difficult to do, but I made myself.
I did not want to record this painful time, but I had hope for things to improve, and wanted a record of just how far we've come. ( I'm busy finding that video to watch tonight. )

So today, we celebrate the progress Scott's made, and our family has made since March 11, 2005.
Today I am lucky to have him.

By the way, he is in on the couch snoring. As we talked this morning on the way to the bus he finally said, "Just take me home. It's my "Anniversary" and I'm taking the day off."  :)

Day off.

The way I remember it...

Sitting at the kitchen table today sorting through hundreds of photos before I went digital,

Cole sat beside me. 

I was searching for that one special picture of Chloe for my blog. 

There were far too many to choose from. 

Suddenly, Cole yells,

"Oh my gosh Mom! Look at this.  Dad is standing! How is he doing that?!"

My eyes filled with tears as I was reminded that he never knew that man. 

It was before his time. 

Unbelievable. 

When I think of my husband and who he is, I remember dating him.  His constant adoration.  

I remember being newlyweds in a little apartment living on love. 

 So happy to have him home at the end of the work day. 

Greeting him at the door with my new little baby.

I remember moving into our first home and our growing family. 

I remember the sound of his diesel truck as he pulled in the driveway and 

the children yelling and running out to greet him. 

I remember his big firm hugs and slow dances. 

All of these things meld into more current memories and experiences and are one. 

That is who he is to me. 

To think that some of our children have never known that man is strange still.

Sometimes I find myself wanting to fill them in on the whole picture.  My picture. 

Tell them what an awesome snow skier he was.  Or water skier. 

Or rollerblader. Or basketball player. Or golfer.

Or how he pulled the oldest 2 children on sleds like a snow dog endlessly in the winter.

Or that he use to work 16 hour days. 

The father my children know has become even stronger and more humble,

 gentler, and more forgiving. 

His patience has grown tremendously. He is a fighter. A go-getter. A hardworker. 

I looked at Cole and said, "Daddy use to be able to walk son. Before you were born."

He looked at me kind of unsure then pulled the picture out of Scott trying to pull the weight out of the ground in ToonTown.  He giggled, "Look at Dad trying to lift that weight". 

He's an XXL

My Mom use to make my Dad's western button up shirts.
She always said it was difficult to find a shirt that fit the man because his arms are so long.
My Mom is an amazing seamstress and his shirts were beautiful. And they fit those long arms.

So my husband has recently done an about face.  You see his clothing of choice is t-shirt and jeans.
It seems to be a family disease. A good disease.  We're comfy people over here.
All his t-shirts say Boise State Football, or Iowa Ping Pong, or Boise State Waterboy.
You get the picture.  Collegiate athletic shirts. Period.
He gets asked often if he played_____ in college.

So anyhow, back to the about face.
He's decided to step  it up and start wearing casual button up dress shirts to school.
I'm behind him 100%.  He looks good in a casual dress shirt.
So we did some shopping and he picked out several XL dress shirts.
He tried them on for school the next morning and looked like an 8th grader who'd hit his growth spurt.
The sleeves all hit him along his forearm.
Ape arms.

So I finally found time to take them back and pick up some XXL's.
Yeah. XXL's.
That's my man.
I actually think it's kind of funny/deceiving that he wears XXL shirts.
He does have some manly shoulders and biceps, but he's not an overall big guy.
Tall, yes. But he downplays his height :)

So the husband has long arms like my Dad,
and while his knuckles may drag,
his arms will always fit all the way around me.
My Mom loves that part. Me too.

It was good.

I've been wanting to go somewhere or do something a lot lately.
I've daydreamed of Maine in the Fall, and the Bahamas when I walk the kids to school.
I settled on a date night to a rooftop concert in Provo.
It was different and felt far away enough. It was out of our normal date night range.
I made Scott wear his handsome "old man sweater" and flip his hair.
He accused me of trying to make us young again (although he's the one that
said it was an old man sweater).  I felt young. And hip.
We enjoyed some new tunes, holding hands, on a rooftop in the chilly September air.
Surrounded by mostly 20-somethings from BYU.
It was new. I like new with someone old.
Then we tried something else new, but definitely not  free. 5 Guys.
I have to admit the food was delish.

It was Stake Conference weekend.
I know the joy of having children old enough/responsible enough
to babysit. Scott and I enjoyed the adult session of Stake Conference,
just the two of us.  The speakers were so uplifting and the Spirit testified
of the truthfulness of their words. My testimony grew.
By the way Jen, I used that cute little book you gave me at sister campout!
President Wilkinson spoke of the Holy Ghost touching our hearts and our minds. (D&C 8)
He talked about the Holy Ghost giving us an impression in our hearts. A general feeling.
Next we must act on that impression. This is faith.
He will then speak again to our minds just as he did for Enos.
It was a beautiful talk.

Scott, Chloe and Asher did the duty of going an hour early to the Sunday meeting
so we could have a soft seat. Again the speakers were so wonderful and inspiring.
I loved President Holland's pioneer stories and especially this  quote:
"Conform our will to His and then make that will rock-ribbed and pioneer strong."
Sounds like some good branding for tires or something of the like.

President Packer shared a story when he was a young seminary teacher.
Of course I immediately thought of Dad, being that President Packer was Dad's seminary teacher.

President Packer had a boy in his class who contributed best when he stayed at home. (Dad assured me this boy was not himself :) During a meeting with several other seminary teachers President Packer asked at what point he could ask the boy not to come to class anymore.

The answer he received was, "What if he were your boy?"

The kids pulled off another Sunday night extravaganza. 

They performed Noah & the Ark complete with puppets,

lighting (think lightning, God speaking to Noah, etc.),backdrops,

and brownies afterwards. I recorded (sorry no still photos for you to enjoy) 

and Scott attempted to keep Grace from pulling the entire

production (precariously set up on a walker) to the ground. 

The weekend?
It was good.

Museum...Round Two

Cole wanted to go to the Dinosaur Museum so much so that Scott decided to do back to back Museum days. That's right they hit $2 Tuesday!!! 

boo.

Crowded.

Busy. 

Moms with many children.

Difficult to maneuver a wheelchair through piles of little people.

Scott told me about women with "lot of kids" who would put their baby 

in the stroller and all the other kids would run in every direction.

I pictured myself in his stories. I AM that woman.

But today it was his day and he got educated. and frustrated.

It was a much shorter day at the Dinosaur Museum, but it still ended with a Tower Cone

and Cole was happy to have spent some time with his Dad.

To the Museum

Scott and Aidan headed out to the Dinosaur Museum on Monday.

No not $2 Tuesday.

Million Dollar Monday.

I was bummed that we were off by one day, but our schedules are packed.

I LOVED the pictures they took on their day together.

I think Million Dollar Monday has its benefits.

They pretty much had the place to themselves.

It would seem to me that the two of them had a fine time exploring Dinosaurs.

And taking some pretty hilarious pictures. 

They topped the day off with a Tower Cone and Aidan came home with some plastic animals.

That would bake 4,163 plastic animals he now has.

Perfect.

Scott & Chloe: Cinema/Cupcake Wars

Chloe had been reading Ramona and Beezus before this one on one date.

So Scott thought it would be fun for the two of them to go see the movie.

They both loved it.

Then to test their culinary skills they created a cupcake. 

We love to watch Cupcake Wars together so they came up with 

a lemon buttermilk cupcake topped with basil cream cheese frosting

and crushed lemonhead candies. They were delicious. I was so impressed.

Pizza & Paint

This wasn't my experience, but I still needed to share how the boys faired.
I did send the camera with them.
This is what I gleaned from their time together.

Really it was all about the Applebeer.
Asher loves that stuff.
So Scott and Asher headed to Pier 49 Pizza for their one on one time.
They enjoyed an entire pizza, a dessert pizza, breadsticks, and a lot of refillable Applebeer.
They came home with NO leftovers.
It was a boy's dream come true.

They talked about sports, playing sports with friends, sports bloopers.
You know... manly conversation.
After lunch they picked out some art supplies to do some oil paintings on canvas.
Asher found some of Scott's old artwork from college a few days ago and was so excited to try this out.
He couldn't believe his Dad had done these paintings.

Their paintings are still in the beginning stages and will take some time but they both have a solid idea of where they're headed. I'll share them when they're finished.

Our Marriage is Officially a Tween

That's right.
It's Happy 12 Years of Marriage to Us.

We are on the brink of the teens, but I'm hoping they will not be challenging and moody.
To celebrate I wanted to do "something adventurous".
I had a lot of ideas rattling around in my head, but it was Scott who pulled out the winner.

We went up to Daniel's Summit and did some ATV riding up in the mountains.

We rode a side by side ATV.

It was wicked fun!
We took turns driving. You should've seen Scott.
Boy he's missed driving, and I loved just enjoying the scenery.

It was beautiful, peaceful, cool, and smelled like clean mountain air.
We packed a lunch and ate along the trail. We came home COVERED in dirt and happy.

Can't wait for next years adventure!
I think I'll start planning now.
Happy 12 years Honey. What a ride.

And I'll sign off with some eye candy.

How I Ate My Way Through My 33rd Birthday.

It began at Communal in downtown Provo with Terri, Ging, and Mom.  

I went out on a limb and had the house made Hunter's Sausage with Spaetzle. 

It was ...interesting. I have to say the Potato and Leek Gratin was my favorite. 

After lunch we walked over to Rooster and enjoyed a chocolate molten dessert with whipped cream. 

This is my most favorite dessert I've ever eaten. 

I've eaten it thrice just to ensure it is my most favorite. 

Then I ate some Costco birthday cake. 

In case you're wondering it says, 

"Happy Birthday Princess Amy"

Scott had this whole theme going. I had a crown. The kids bowed when they addressed me. 

I look like a princess eating the corner off that cake don't I?

I enjoyed dinner at La Caille with Scott and our friends the Bentleys.

I have to admit I was feeling a bit uptight at this fancy French restaurant.

However, after a few good laughs we were all relaxed and had a fantastic time. 

I had the Cambridge shortribs. Oh they were tender and delicious. 

After dinner Scott surprised me with reservations to stay the night in SL and do some birthday shopping.  

It was a delicious birthday. 

Come on In and Make Yourself at Home

When I've thought about what kind of mother I want to be I've always wanted my children and their friends to feel welcome in my home.  I want them to feel accepted, loved, comfortable, and have a few laughs.  So when I  I finished working on the computer and walked in the family room to find this:

 It made me smile.

 

 And how cool of a Dad is Scott?!