Okay, here's the deal.
I had a mother moment. I was sitting, thinking, and then I felt impressed that
we should have some one on one dates with our kids before school started.
Dad one on one with each kid.
Mom one on one with each kid.
No friends to come along, no other siblings, no other parent.
We started by taking some time to think of each child individually.
What would this child love? What have they been wanting me to see, or do or create with them that I haven't made time for? What budding talents could we tap into?
Then we wrote them each a little note telling them why we chose what we did and how we love them.
I printed off a calendar and we got to scheduling.
We scheduled the date and time for each one,
and dedicated ourselves to making this work.
For me it is always too easy to say, "I can't I need to _________".
and dedicated ourselves to making this work.
For me it is always too easy to say, "I can't I need to _________".
Fill in the blank: Start the laundry, mop the floor, run to the store.
Today was the first scheduled one on one.
Me and Coley.
I had decided we would go swimming.
He was so excited.
I brought my goggles. I was that serious.
I would not be the Mommy on the side of the pool keeping my hair dry like I usually am.
We dove, rode the slides, talked to each other under water, did tricks, practiced hand stands, stood under the big dump bucket, practiced back floats, blew kisses underwater. Afterward we shared some ice cream.
I knew it was a success when Cole said, "I'm so happy!"
What did I learn?
* I don't really listen to my children during the day. It's all kind of white noise and I'm just busy running the day, but not listening to the people who fill my day.
*I can have a lot of fun with my 5 year old if I'd have some wild abandon. He actually requested we bring a friend to the pool as we got ready to leave. I knew what he was thinking. "Mom will sit on the poolside and I'm going to have to play all alone." What he didn't know was that I brought my goggles and I can play with the best of them. Sometimes I need to set down the to-do list and enjoy the moment.
* Quality one on one time sends the message "You're important to me".
* That Cole boy is one cute kid. Quirky, handsome, adventurous, loving. (Already knew this, just reinforced the facts).
* Spending one on one time with your children strengthens your marriage. A strange connection perhaps, but telling Scott how our one on one time went made Scott happy. He expressed his appreciation for me, and that made me happy. Scott- happy+ Me- happy= We- happy.
9 comments:
Genius idea!! Cole must have thought you were the COOLEST mom ever in that pool!! And I bet a lot of other kids were jealous. Excellent reminder... ties in nice with our sacrament meeting yesterday. I've been thinking all day yesterday and today about how I can apply it. Thanks for the suggestion ;)
You (and Scott)
are simply amazing.
Your kids are so lucky.
As always, you inspire me.
Your awesome Amy. I love reading your blog, your such a good mom:)
You really are a good Mom Aim! I think I'm going to start dating other people too! Thanks for the advice! Love you tons!
That IS genius, and I will give you credit for sitting down and scheduling date times, activities, and then writing individual letters to each kid. However, the original idea of "dating" each one of your kids goes to Mom. Remember her either telling you that you are sick and to stay in bed or picking you up from school WAY early. Hiding in the blanket closet while Dad was home for lunch and she'd still sneak you snacks while in hiding. Then going to Ropers, Twin Falls, or JcPenny's. And always a great lunch. That was her special one-on-one time with us kids.
Elder Holland said in his talk, A Prayer for the Children, that "children are likely to exceed their parents example". So thanks for the example Mom, and thanks for setting the bar a little higher Amy.
And thanks for letting me blog on your blog.
We have done this. Not to that extent but I normally have a child attached to me so its a little different. We need to start doing it again. My kids always say,"remember when just you (or Dad) and me did____ that was so fun." I feel like I'm mom of the year when I do that stuff. Good job, it's sounds like you where mom of the year.
YUP!! We love one-one-one time. Thanks for reminding me what has recently gotten lost in the shuffle of "living". You are a great mother. I agree
Sweet idea!!! I better suggest this idea to Sam. That is an awesome idea! You both are amazing and sweetest parents for sure!
I LOVE LOVE LOVE IT.
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